Smells Like Idiot Spirit
by CaptainFirePower
Summary: Series of Oneshots about idiots, for idiots, by an idiot. Each one completly random, but meaningful in it's own idiotic little way. First up: Minori Tsukishima's example of being a gentlewoman.
1. Hey, My Sun-Eyed Idiot

**I'm not a good story teller, but I try my best.**

**I wrote this because I think that these two are adorable. (Kurea and Minori)**

* * *

"We're one step closer to graduating, " Kurea stated as she glanced at a calendar in the corner of the room. She still had 3 years left, but she was quick to thinking about her future. Probably because she is stuck in some sword bearer program, and she doesn't even like swords. But for Minori's sake, she was willing to stay.

Minori sat on her shinyuu's bunk with box of assorted candy in hand. Though most were in her mouth by now. She nodded as Kurea talked, but it's not guarenteed that she's actually paying attention.

Her Shinyuu sighed longingly, "I'll be the first one in my family to get married too. My sisters are still being stale old maids and expect me to follow in their example."

"Mhm."

"I'm going to marry a rich man and there will be no need for college. See? No effort and no money needed."

Minori gulped down her candy and decided to ask, out of not wanting to sound boring, "What kind of guy do ya'want, Kurea?"

Kurea paused to think. "I..." Then it all came to her. "...I want a man who is refined, self made, has all kinds of, like, talents and stuff," She began, "He will be rich, handsome and tall." Kurea smiled at the thought.

Minori nodded. "Yeah?"

"He would be kind, respectful..." Kurea became flustered as she rambled. "...He would always notice how I dress, what color my nails are, and how I did my hair, and he'd, like, always know what to say to a woman."

Minori had begun listening to her at some point.

Kurea stopped and smiled sadly, "But, sadly, I doubt someone like that exists in this world, so..."

"Kurea," the short girl broke in, "are you a fart? Because you blow me away."

Hoshikawa Kurea froze and slowly turned to the girl with a perplexed look. "What?"

With the most _serious_ face, Minori set her candy box off her lap and stood up. She walked in front of the taller girl and looked up at her. "Kurea, if you are what you eat, then you must eat your nail polish alot."

The lazy girl faked an awkward laugh as her face slowly reddened. "Ha ha ha, very funn-"

"Kurea, I like your, um... Face."

"W-what?"

"Kurea," the dog-like girl said again, standing on her toes in an attempt to look taller, "Are you a taco? Because taco's are good."

This was painfully awkward.

'_I'm not sure what to make of this..._' The lavender haired girl stopped thinking, closed her eyes and slapped her forehead. She initially caught on to what the girl was doing and felt a wierd twinge in her stomach.

"Did you fall from heaven? Because you look like you fell from heaven... I think..?"

It was something between happiness and anxiety. It was more intense than the previous feeling, but she couldn't help it, and she didn't know if she welcomed this feeling or not. Minori grinned proudly as Kurea put her arms on the shorter girls shoulders. "What am I going to do with you?" She asked as she looked down at the rather short girl. And Minori was short to her. Standing only at 4'11.

Her small tooth poking out with her wide smile. Which Kurea would _never_ admit she found cute.

"Is your dad a thief? Cause he must've stole my sweet buns and gave them to you."

"Minori. **That's too much**."

* * *

**If you think Tsukishima's short, that's nothing, I'm 4'9. **

**Did I, like, use excessive 'valley girl speech' (you know, ****_like_****, this) when I, like totally, wrote Kurea? I, like, hope not.**

**Next up is either a Kiji/Saru fic or a completely random Student Council fic. (I'll note that both are already done)**


	2. Fell In Love With An Idiot

**Explanation for this oneshot lies at the end of the chapter.**

**Yep, it's a fic about the second half of the Momotarou-gumi (Which is my favorite group at Tenchi Academy)**

* * *

After various movies, magazines, and secretly paying attention to other people's conversations during class, Otoha Kijimiya, a girl descended from shamans, learned the secret of getting that _girl_ closer to you. Michi was _that_ girl. Unlike Otoha, Michi was her exact opposite. She was raised on a farm with her parents and little sister, but it's also worth mentioning that she is a bit more... Oblivious.

"Michi," Otoha called and Michi looked up from her lunch and welcomed her back from her 10 minute trip, "Do you want to come over to my dorm tonight and watch this film I acquired out from Tenchi's library?"

"Ooh!" Michi's eyes widened, as did her smile. "What kind of movie is it?" She asked.

"The scariest movie in the history of this planet." Otoha boasted, she looked her in the eyes, "not to mention... The tape is haunted."

"Ohh, that sounds like fun!"

"Indeed." It does. Otoha was already imagining how it would go. The movie would reach a very startling point in its run, then Michi, too scared to continue watching, would leap into her arms. She would stay calm and cool throughout the night and comfort the scared girl.

* * *

"Hey, I need you out of the dorm today."

Her roommate glanced at her from the top bunk, where she lay reading a magazine. "Hm?"

Otoha crossed her arms and tapped her foot. "I'm about to determine my eternal happiness in a few minutes and I need you out of this room." She demanded without a single exaggeration in her mind.

Her roommate frowned. "This is my dorm room too you know!" She yelled in dissatisfaction as she threw her arms in the air. And this wasn't the first time Otoha tried to ram her roommate out of the room for a night.

Kiji's eyes narrowed at her and she muttered in annoyance.

* * *

10:00 PM

Michi sat on her knees in front of the television set with a bag of potato chips sitting on her lap as Otoha put the cassette into the VCR.

"Kijichan, was your roommate really okay with this?"

The girl in question nodded. "Yes, she held no complaints," She said hastily and quickly sat down. Both Shinyuu wore gym shorts and a regular t-shirt.

With the lights off and the door closed, only the light of the telivision gleamed in the room.

As the movie started, Otoha smirked smugly. 'Michi will absolutly melt into my arms like butter with a film like this,' She thought.

***Five Minutes Into The Movie***

Otoha clutched a pillow as she watched the movie in badly concealed fear, while Michi, on the other hand, was blatantly unnaffected by the images on the screen. She stared with a ditzy blank face, slowly grabbing a potato chip every now and then absentmindedly.

Kiji glanced at her while she did this and mentally slapped herself. 'This backfired. She isn't scared at all... But I _am _dammit!"

"Oh! The TV looks all wierd!" Michi whispered out loud to no one in particular.

Otoha didn't pay attention to why she had said that. The TV did indeed begin to look different, like a big hole was being melted in the center and a head with long hair was trying to come out.

The shaman girl grabbed Michi's shoulder with a trembling hand. "M-Michi, are you sca-"

The door slammed open.

"I SENSE A DISTURBANCE IN SPIRITUAL PLANE! SOMETHING IS BEING SUMMONED!" Came a shriek from Isuzu Inugami who was wearing a white gown and her stringy hair was let loose from it's ribbons, making her look like the scariest ghost of a child story.

Kijimiya Otoha was screaming bloody murder as she clung both arms around Michi's neck and pressed up against her.

"Wah-!" Said Michi with a completely red face, but for a completely different reason.

Isuzu ran into the room, pulled out the cassette tape and made some kind of creepy Buddhist prayer, before breaking the tape in half over her knee. She held them in her hands, breathing heavily.

"Wanko! What're you off screamin' 'bout this time!?" Another high pitched but rowdy voice sounded and Momoka Kibi ran into the room wearing her night clothes simular to that of a PE uniform. She grabbed the tape out of her Shinyuu's hands and threw them aside to calm her down.

"That's a library fine." Otoha pointed out with her lips pursed.

"Shut up Kiji-ko!"

Michi paused and looked down at Kijimiya, who's arms were still wrapped around her neck and she was still pressed up

against her. "You feel like letting go now? Scaredy-cat." Michi said, but even with her slightly irritated voice, she was still blushing wildly from the contact.

Otoha was about to let go, but after all her trouble she through to get in this position, regardless if she was the cool one or not, she had reached her goal. She only held tighter and "I'm cold," Was her excuse.

Isuzu turned to them and smiled. "Let's rejoice in your safety. There was a demon in this tape that would've possibly done some real evil."

The tone in in her voice was joyful and relieved, but the mindset in which she said it caused everyone else in the room to shiver simultaneously.

"N-no problem! Thanks a bunch, Wan-wan," Michi thanked the girl.

Otoha stayed quiet and Momoka furrowed her eyes at her. "Hey. Aren't'ya gonna say 'Thank you'?" She interrogated with the air of a mafia-boss, "And how long are you two gonna stay all pressed up like that?"

Kiji cursed at Momoka under her breath, and then looked at Isuzu with sincere gratitude. "Thank you very much, Inugami-san."

Isuzu's hands shot up and she shook her head no. "Oh no, it's fine you two. It'a not like I was going to ignore such a problem anyway."

The Kibi clapped her hands together loudly. "Okay, we got this over with. Let's go Wanko. Thank you, you're welcome, and have a good night, Sagara-san," Momoka waved her off and grabbed Isuzu's wrist and left the room and closed the door behind her. Paying no attention to Otoha.

"So what just happened, Kijichan?"

"I'm embracing you as an apology for putting your life in danger."

"Yeah right, you wuss." Michi said with a giggle.

* * *

**So, I read a one-page doujin by Mori (Unknown). It was very simular to this, excluding a few parts. I thought it was funny and made it into a short fanfiction. I love writing about Otoha Kijimiya losing her cool in an attempt to get closer to the ever oblivious Michi.**

**Next up... I think it's either the Shirofukus-being-random fic, or an Aya-Jun story. Maybe even neither of them.**


End file.
